Marriage Of One

February 27, 2011

The End of the Beginning

Filed under: marriage,sex — marriageofone @ 10:41 pm
Tags: ,

The day had to come.

Any day now, and I can’t be too sure about when exactly we’ll reach the 6 month mark of the ‘drought’.

To be honest it has crept up on me.  Sure I miss having a sex life, but you get used to missing it, if you know what I mean and you just accept it and time moves on and on and on.

For the last 2-3 years Susan had kind of reached a 2-3 month ‘cycle’.  She would wake up one morning I guess realising that ‘something’ needed doing, do it over the course of the next week or so, put a tick on the mental list and then completely forget about it or ignore it for another 8-12 weeks.

But I think something flipped during this last year.  It may have been the house move and the arrival of the ‘new life’ feeling that made her notice perhaps (I’m just guessing) that her cycle was a bit one-sided.  She’s noticed that despite her ‘effort’ every 8-12 weeks I wasn’t really bothered.

And perhaps because of that she has decided either to punish me for my lack of interest, or reward herself with an even longer cycle.

The upshot is that any day now we’re going to break the record – really truly smash it actually – for the longest sexless period that cannot be attributed to pregnancy or child-birth.  If I remember correctly our previous record was around 3 months – achieved less than 12 months after we got married.

Since then we’ve done 6 weeks even a few 8 week droughts (back then I thought it couldn’t get worse!), settling finally in the last few years for sex 4 or 5 times a year.

Now of course we may have broken the back of it.  This could be the end of the beginning of my low sex marriage and the scene is set now for the long term sexLESS marriage.

I wonder if we’ll ever do it again?  Probably.  Susan’s the kind of person who out of the blue will suddenly decide she needs to do it – just so she can claim the moral high ground for having made the effort in her own mind and also to prove to herself that she can still get me aroused – should she choose.

How does this make me feel. To be honest, like I said it had to happen.  The trend has always been towards this day and I never fooled myself into thinking it wouldn’t happen – not since she rejected therapy.  And because it ‘s no surprise, I feel completely at ease about it.

I’m carrying on.

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